6 comments on “Earth’s Core B5 C2!”

  1. “Stump!”
    I think you want ‘stomp’

    Upon listening to the two’s conversation, the direness of their situation became clear o everyone among the fifty two, be it Core Master or Mist Lords.
    o –> to

    More of half of the remaining fifty one experts stared slack jawed, pondering now where to attack when their target changed form.
    slack jawed –> slack-jawed

    Raroen did not extract any effort and redirected the three horns bull’s horns attack to the ground.
    Extract? What about ‘spare’ or some other word?

    To kill every one of his Master’s enemies, he had to confine them to one place,
    To kill every one of his Master’s enemies, he had to confine them to one place,

    “This job was supposed to be easy…” The Basement Floor humans whipped.
    Whipped? What about ‘whined’?

    Reply

    • As usual, thank you!
      Two things… In “Extract” I meant to say that it took him no effort. If I used “Spare” won’t it mean that he gave his best…?
      “To kill every one of his Master’s enemies, he had to confine them to one place,” what’s the difference between the two lines?

      Reply

      • It has two spaces in between ‘to’ and ‘confine’ should be just one space per word. I didn’t realize that when I published the comment, it just auto-corrected itself. If you look more closely at that area you might noticed it. Most people overlooked this. Like I said before I am proofreader for few indie authors and so I am used to it, looking for the small errors.

        What about ‘effortless’ I think more simply to replace ‘did not extract any effort’ with ‘effortless’ in sentence somewhere.

        Reply

        • Fixed the double space, eagle eyes.
          I changed the line to “Raroen effortlessly redirected…”

          Thanks for the notes!

          P.S I’m currently in the hospital and not sure how long I will stay. If I’ll return too late, I’ll probably won’t have to finish today’s chapter…

          Reply

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