Sefiria Ch 1-1 v2

Posted by visunoriva on 24 December 2015
Posted in: RO Machine translated, sefiria, Sefuria. 39 Comments

 

 

Hello everyone *bow*  ~ I am new translator for this site , and this is my first time translating something :> so if there’s any mistakes please tell me .

And english is not my mother language. I always got confused when choosing some words.

This is just 900 words and take me 5 hours to finish this =w=~

Also this main character remind me of Rudeus , really

Then …. *bow*

oh , could anyone help me with some words ? already put the raw overthere .

Then again *bow*

This chapter is edited by hayashimoritan

for hayashimoritan , thank you very much for correcting all off my mistake. *bow* ( it’s a lot you know Orz )

oh, and I decie to change his name from

Sefuria -> Sefiria

chapter 1 – In a certain Village

 

 

39 comments on “Sefiria Ch 1-1 v2”

  3. thx for the chapter (part of a chapter I guess ?)
    You still have a few mistakes but nothing that can’t be solved with a good editor, probably cause because you wanted to keep the sense of the sentences
    the name is different in the header in MTL-works is it SefUria or SefIria ?
    when yo say Rudeus, do you mean Rudeus Greyrat from Musoku Tensei ? if yes, it looks likes they have the same thought about their respective reincarnation but I hope the story won’t be the same, got bored of Musoku and I never finished it

    Reply

  8. some mistakes:
    With distance about 3 > With a distance of about 3

    Furthermore almost all of young man is absent because of human and demon race war ,and > Furthermore almost all of the young men are absent because of the human demon race war, and
    (when talking about more than one man its men, punctuation is usually put at the end of the last word)

    so they can make living trough this day > so they can make living through this day (this is a common misspelling in translations trough is a piece of farm equipment)

    looking at the book’s opening on the floor > looking at the book open on the floor

    that side there’s woman face > that side there’s a woman’s face

    before you become little more big > before you become a little bigger

    even adult can’t do something like read , writing and arithmetic. > even an adult can’t do something like read, write, and arithmetic. (writing would be used if you were talking about doing something currently)

    i have this “Previous live memory” > i have this “Previous life memory”

    high school and university I’m not studying > high school and university never studying

    some company , it’s end up that > some company, it ended up

    If person not working they’re gonna lose > If a person is not working they’re gonna lose

    Reply

  12. I don’t know if this is right or not, just ignore it if you think it’s absurd..

    Manual labor is , the place to find death -> Manual labor, is the place to find death

    …., it seems there’s 『Beorant Imperial capital』 that posses about 12 thousand people -> …, there is a town called/ one can find 『Beorant Imperial capital』 that posses about 12 thousand people
    (it just that “it seems there’s” doesn’t make any sense)

    Furthermore almost all of the young men -> Furthermore, almost all of the men
    … human demon race war, -> … human-demon race war,
    …,and now every house’s have -> …,and now every house have

    I desperately tried to lift my face which is looking at the book open on the floor -> I desperately tried to lift my face which is still looking at the opened book on the floor
    I’m still can’t raise my head so , … -> I still can’t raise my head, so…
    That footsteps moving to my direction and , that side there’s a woman’s face who’s searching for me -> Those footsteps are moving to my direction, and on that side, there is the face of a woman who is looking for me

    She look’s like Junior high school student -> She looks like a Junior high school student
    (I think you need to distinguish between ‘s and s, sorry no offense)

    Those are some of my opinions, I think you need a good editor to help you..

    Reply

    • thanks ~ you know , english is not my mother language , so i got pretty confused about ‘s and s , i’m gonna read about it later ,

      as for ” it seems there’s 『Beorant Imperial capital』 that posses about 12 thousand people ” . i use ” it’s seems ” because MC is just guessing from the information he got , and he don’t know the acctual place .

      still , i gonna fix the other , again thanks :>

      Reply

      • you’re welcome..
        well, I’m also not a native spaker, that’s why I’m still guessing though..

        ‘s usually used for a possession of someone, for example if there is a person called A and he/she have a book, the book can be called as A’s book..
        while s is used for the verb for simple sentence (active) after he, she or name of the person (single), for example he reads a book..

        oh I see, well, I can’t translate japanese to english, so I don’t know the right original sentences are.
        So pardon my rudeness then..

        Reply

  13. Visun, I’m currently an editor helping out snow with ROW and master of dungeon. Do u want me to help you edit your translations before posting? I can also crosscheck with raws since I know a decent amount of Japanese. Reply if interested. I’m pretty free this year end.

    Reply

  14. I havent read it yet but as soon as you said its similar to rudeus, i really loved his character …everything except taking on multiple wives. Please dont have multi-wives like him, anything but that ;C (no offense to those that do, just my personal preference)

    Reply

Leave a comment